I’ve learned a lot down through the years,
With many tough lessons won.
Through blood, sweat and salty tears
It never has been fun.
If you want to build an empire,
These rules can be your stencil.
Write all this information down,
With a sharpened number 2 pencil.
Rule Number One
You have to be a media whore
Telling everyone you meet about your brand new store.
Or maybe that you just found a cure for cancer
But if they don’t know you’re calling,
They’re never going to answer.
Wear a t-shirt with your logo on the front,
Put a sign up in your front yard.
And never ever think about leaving your house
Without your business card.
Number 2…
You must get your money back
If you extend someone some credit.
If you let that bill stay out too long,
You’re never gonna get it.
I think this is a crying shame,
It’s unbelievable.
All the businesses that folded
Over accounts receivable.
Rule Number 3,
You really gotta follow, Man.
Sit down and write yourself a business plan.
It’s kind of like a road map
Of the steps that you will take.
From who your competition is,
To how much money you’ll make.
If you’re going to need a business loan
I’ll say that you’re delirious.
If you skip this most important step
No bank will take you serious.
Rule Number 4…
I KNOW you heard this before.
If a business partner’s knockin’
Don’t even open up the door.
…Number 5
This rule I really have to shout.
YOU AND YOUR EMPLOYEE SHOULD NOT BE GOING OUT!
It starts as sexy, sneaky fun,
But soon it will turn scary.
When your whole office begins to learn
You’re screwing your secretary.
Relationships and businesses must not be allowed to meet.
Listen to what I’m telling you,
NEVER SHIT WHERE YOU EAT!
Rule Number 6
This rule must not be underrated.
Keep your family and business
Completely separated.
In no way is this meant as rude
Or any way unkind,
But you gotta watch your family
Because they will rob you blind.
Get yourself some resumes;
Make sure the right guy’s hired.
‘Cause Christmas will be miserable
If your mother-in-law gets fired.
Rule Number 7
Give your business time to grow,
Before you clean out the cash box.
Don’t run straight to the Mercedes sto’
or the mall for Gucci socks.
Pay yourself a little bit
And reinvest the rest.
Many a promising entrepreneur
Has failed this simple test.
The truth is, Friends, I skipped this step
And here’s the long and short:
I drove my metallic gray Ferrari
Straight to bankruptcy court.
…Rule Number 8
Learn this rule from front to back.
Make sure you pay your income tax!
Your Uncle Sam don’t mess around;
Don’t take this warning lightly.
You’ll find yourself locked up in prison
Getting sodomized nightly.
Rule Number 9
Could have been number 2.
You must keep a positive mental attitude.
Make no mistake,
Things will get rough.
But you must stay focused and mentally tough.
Keep a pretty picture
Of how your business ought to be.
The only thing that can really stop you
Is negativity.
…Number 10
Follow this rule and you’ll fly like an eagle,
Make sure that your business is perfectly legal.
Sometimes the right way seems much harder fought
But take it from me, YOU WILL GET CAUGHT!
Before you steal or decide to push weight,
Re-read the last line
Of Rule Number 8.
Follow these rules and everything will go smooth.
You’ll make plenty of profits from every move.
It won’t always be easy,
As you already know,
Just concentrate your mind
On the positive cash flow.
20 Users Responded in " The 10 Rules Of Business "
You should be proud of yourself. That was BADASS.
Shitting where you eat is like vomiting where you bathe..
Point number 1 is very crucial in today’s business world.. People are so “ad-blind” that some simple banners or spot in the local newspaper is not enough.. T shirts, buttons, and branded toothbrushes will work wonders…
@WriterDad: Sir, Your “Promise” was my inspiration. Thank You
@Elijah: Absolutely. Especially for the new business that does not have the luxury of unlimited marketing resources.
Great poem, haiku, limmerick or song… I don’t remember what these are called. Very original, I can see this being used in classrooms. You must have written this with your sleeves rolled up on your pink-leather jacket.
@Garrett: Thanks, G. I’m glad you dug it. It was definitely something different I thought I’d try after reading a poem written by a REAL writer by the name of WriterDad at http://www.writerdad.com
Hi T. Edwards,
Ah, I see a poet with a message. I was trying to figure out what is the most important in business, but it all is.
I agree “it won’t always be easy”, but if done right, very rewarding.
@Barbara: Absolutely. To be honest, I don’t think it’s EVER easy…but if we stick with it and we do it right…
Sometimes it takes more than blood, sweat, and tears to build an empire. Persistance is key. We can bleed, sweat, and cry after the checks start coming in. So keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the stars! Keep it up T! You’re doing an awsome job man!
You’re definitely correct JetSet! Maybe that’s why I haven’t made it yet…too much bleeding, sweating, and crying! Thanks so much for stopping by.
T
Man, how did you put a whole book about starting a business…no, no better yet a New Business Bible in tht form of a poem? Cudos! Thanks for the info!
@MoneyJunkie: Hey MoneyJunkie, I once had a boss that told me about K.I.S.S. It stood for “Keep It Simple, Stupid”. I was just trying to “keep it simple!” I’m glad you got something out of it and thanks so much for stopping back by. Big changes are on the horizon so stop back soon!
T
Fabulous! Thanks for putting this together!
Matt
Good list. Don’t forget too that employees will rob you blind as well.
All those pens, cokes, waters, silverware, etc. will all go home with ‘em.
Definitely great, and humorous tips. Especially the part about investing instead of spending. You never know when the economy will go haywire, and it is a good idea to have something to tide you over during those down times.
@SmallBizBee: Thank YOU for stopping by!
@John Hoff: You got that right, John. Employees will definitely put you in the red! You sound like you have some experience!
@Kristi: Thank you, Kristi. It is absolutely essential to have something put aside for the hard times. Unfortunately, there are very few people that have anything put away and when the hard times hit…
Yeah, the greed for many people is too big, and it’s their biggest problem. The greed to have better things, just to look good in other eyes. Thank god I am not greedy, and I reinvest more than 60% of my online income.
Cheers,
The Moneyac
@Moneyac
Wise you are for reinvesting, my friend! That’s definitely a great way to keep your business around for the long haul! Thanks!
T
Absolutely awesome rules… and all these tactics really works , if you can firmly stick to it.
Thanks for sharing.
Huh! I though this is poem anywhere you did a good job telling the 10 rules about buisness. But, if you need to earn more money. Never run away income tax, but you can have a method to save a lots money from paying income tax. That’s why majority rich people paying the income tax that not equal to what they actually earn.
@Salwa: Hi Salwa, you are ABSOLUTELY spot on with “sticking to it”…as a matter of fact THAT gives me an idea for a post. Stay tuned and thanks for being my muse.
@Speed Yo: Hey Speed Yo, See Rule#8 about income tax. Trust me on this.
T
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